#AToZChallenge — Cats

***My post for the letter C is late because my browser kept crashing last night so I gave up :-)***

I love my dogs, but if I’m being honest, I’m a cat person. Not sure why I’ve always been drawn to cats, but I loved them for as long as I can remember. I have been fortunate enough to be a “mom” to 6 cats in my life. I got my first cat when I was a little girl. He was a beautiful gray kitten with white paws that I named James. I didn’t have him long, though, because he died in a freak accident at home while I was at school. I won’t share what happened because it’s a pretty upsetting story, even more so if you’re an animal/cat person.

My next cat came a few years later. Her name was Pussywillow. I wanted to name her Pussypaws, but my parents in their infinite wisdom managed to talk me out of that name! My mom suggested Pussywillow instead, knowing that I loved pussywillows. I had Pussywillow for 16 years. She loved chicken and would literally come snatch it right out of your mouth when you were eating it. She loved to watch birds. But she would get so nervous doing that, she would lose fur on her back. She actually often had a bald spot from her nerves from watching birds! I had her for 16 years. She got very sick near the end of her life and I had to have her put down. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done. I cried like I lost a member of my family; I know now that I did. My pets are like family to me.

Another cat I had was Monster Monster. He was huge and he lived up to his name! I found him on the side of a highway exit ramp as a kitten. I can only assume some horrible human dumped a box of kittens there since there was a box not far from where I found Monster. He could leap from the floor to the top of the fridge, and he loved to lie on top of the fridge and swat your head as you walked by. He would go outside and play like a dog, and the only way to get him back in the house was to bring the electric can opener outside so he could hear it. He would come running, thinking he was getting fed. But Monster Monster’s fatal flaw was confusion about where to pee. Since he kept using the dining room, he ended up having to go live on a farm where I am sure he enjoyed all sorts of shenanigans with the other barn cats and animals.

Then there was Scooter. My brother found him in a car wash where he worked one summer and brought him home. He was a handsome orange cat and we lived blissfully with him until my daughter Becky was born. The he wasn’t so happy that he wasn’t the baby anymore and starting peeing in my apartment. He went to go live with my parents in Ohio then.

When Becky was a toddler, we adopted 2 barn kittens from a friend. They were beautiful calicos and we named them Misty and Shasta. Misty was my cat. She loved me and that was about it! Shasta had ear mites so badly when she was a kitten that it damaged her hearing so she was deaf for all intents and purposes. But that cat loved Becky. She would let Becky do anything with her. Becky carried that cat like a rag doll around the house and pushed her around in a doll stroller — one time even right down the stairs! That cat didn’t care, she loved Becky that much. Becky used to blame Shasta for the naughty things she did, like when she wrote on the walls with black crayon! Both those cats lived a very long life, but the both eventually had to be put down. Misty developed a tumor in her sinuses so she couldn’t breathe properly. Shasta had kidney failure and wouldn’t eat or even really walk around.

I don’t have any cats now, just my 2 dogs. But my daughter recently adopted a kitten named Fergus, so he is my grandkitty! He is amazingly playful, and he loves Becky the way Shasta did. My mom also has a 16 pound black cat named Dude who is the most adorable troublemaker ever! I will make friends with cats where ever I go. As much as I love my dogs, my heart will always be with cats!

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#AToZChallenge — Blue Heaven

My post for today is about my very favorite restaurant in the whole entire world — Blue Heaven in Key West. When I visit Key West, I always insist on having breakfast at Key West, and I always get the same thing: I start with a mimosa. The I eat an obscene breakfast: I get an eggs Benedict with Key West pink shrimp and lime Hollandaise sauce and a thick slice of their homemade banana bread. I get it maybe once a year, so I don’t care that it’s probably 8000 calories. The food there is so good, but it is really the atmosphere that draws me in. It’s like someone opened a restaurant in their backyard. There are patio tables and chairs all around under trees and canopies for shade. There are a few chickens and cats roaming around, really adding to the Key West vibe. And they often have entertainment on the stage, even in the morning. There is almost always a wait, but it is so worth it to be able to eat a nice meal in such a relaxing atmosphere. If you ever get down to Key West, be sure to hit up Blue Heaven for a lovely meal — I recommend breakfast!

The entrance to Blue Heaven — plenty of bike parking space available!
My favorite meal at Blue Heaven — breakfast! A Benedict with Key West pink shrimp and lime Hollandaise sauce!
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#AToZChallenge — All Too Well

For my first post of the year in the Blogging A to Z Challenge, I have decided to write about a song I love (in fact, many of my posts for this year will be about songs). The song for this post is “All Too Well” by Taylor Swift. I’m not necessarily a Swiftie (her voice leaves a lot to be desired, but I will concede that she has improved as time has gone on), but where my fandom with her lies is in her song lyrics. And “All Too well” has some of the most emotionally powerful lyrics I’ve heard.

I appreciate the imagery she creates in phrases like, “The autumn leaves falling like pieces into place” and “We dance around the kitchen in the refrigerator light”. I admire the structure in the line, “You tell me about your past thinking your future was me.” And perhaps the line I love the most is what I see as a microcosm of the way we treat each other in society nowadays, “So casually cruel in the name of being honest.” I mean, seriously, why do we think honesty is always the best policy? Sometimes we need to be tactful and keep our mouths shut. I have really come to resent the phrase, “Hey, I’m just being honest. Keeping it real.” It’s casual cruelty n the name of being honest.

Finally, I appreciate the entire story arc Swift tells in the lyrics. I’m a sucker for tortured, impossible love stories, and the one in this song seems to fir the bill. This was a good relationship with potential and it didn’t work out and the pain the narrator feels is obvious and deep. It’s sad from beginning to end. Even the happy moments are retold with a tinge of sadness, and it’s that sadness I respond to. My husband always told me that the best poetry I ever wrote was when I wrote out of pain, so maybe that’s why I love the pain in this song.

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Blogging A to Z Challenge 2019

Because writing is truly my passion, I will once again be participating in the Blogging A to Z Challenge during the month of April. Almost every day of the month there will be a blog post from me based on each letter of the alphabet. That’s your cue to either gear up to read or unfollow or block me 🙂 We always have the option of writing thematically, but I seem to struggle with that, so I always just kind of keep my theme as “pot pourri” or “et cetera” or “miscellaneous” haha! That being said, I’d love some input — anything in particular you’d like me to write about? If so, feel free to drop suggestions in the comments and I will see if I can find a way to accommodate your request!

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#IWSG — POV

This post is written as part of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group, where writers can share their thoughts and offer support to each other in a judgement-free zone! This month, the following question was posed: Whose perspective do you like to write from best, the hero (protagonist) or the villain (antagonist)? And why?

I can only say that I like to write from the perspective of the hero/protagonist simply because that’s all I’ve ever done or even considered. I’ve never thought about writing from the perspective of the villain/antagonist so I’ve never tried it. I’m guessing it would be a worthwhile exercise, though, to be able to gain full understanding of all my characters.

I suppose, though, now that I really think of it, the novel that I have been working on a little bit at a time for the past couple years is written from both the protagonist and antagonist’s points of view. I started with only the protagonist, but decided that there needed to be another perspective, so the story gets told from alternating points of view — the main character and her husband. So maybe I was just thrown by the word “villain” and need to focus more on the term “antagonist.”

I guess I like writing from the perspective of the protagonist simply because it’s what I’m most comfortable with and what I have the most experience with. Not an imaginative or deep response, but honest!

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Gratitude

In our school district this week, we are celebrating Random Acts of Kindness. Kids and adults alike are encouraged to do things out of kindness for others. One of the activities is schools are having guest speakers. At the junior high, the guest speaker was Adam Kimble, who’s a local guy who’s also a bit of a celebrity — he’s an ultra-runner possibly best known for his success on Discovery Channel’s survival show The Wheel.

He spoke about the role kindness played in the opportunities and successes he’s had in his life and his adventures — kindness to others, from others, and to himself. It was actually a very interesting take on his many experiences — one that I am sure many people don’t think much about, the role that different types of kindness plays is different events of our lives. At the end of his talk, he also spoke briefly about gratitude. He mentioned the gratitude he had for people who helped him during his races and total strangers who helped him and his crew when he ran across the United States. He spoke about the role that others played in his successes, which got me thinking about this:

Now, I am not here to debate the politics associated with President Obama, but this speech drew tons of ire from people who worked their rear ends off to build successful businesses. There was snark and sarcasm to spare from people who were offended by his remarks. Hearing Adam speak today about kindness and gratitude made me think how misguided people were who took offense at what Obama said. Let me share an example from my personal life.

In 2017, I ran the Chicago marathon. Notice the pronoun. I. Because I did indeed do it. I crossed that start line and 8 hours, 7 minutes, and 21 hard, painful, grueling seconds later, I crossed that finish line. I did it. Me. But it would be so incredibly misleading and downright arrogant of me to say nobody else in this world played a role in what is probably the biggest success story of my whole life, probably my proudest personal accomplishment. Because I absolutely did not do it alone at all! My friends Larry and Cathy really nudged me in the direction of running that marathon. My husband granted me all the time I needed to be able to devote hours and hours to training for weeks on end. Many people, both known to me and unknown, donated toward my charity fundraiser. The coaches with Team in Training who helped me with my training, offered support on course, and even the two angels who walked by my side for the last few miles before leaving me to cover the last .2 on my own, all made my finish possible. The crowd support buoyed me up for miles along the course. Volunteers who worked the race and the aid stations waited for me and offered assistance for me if and when I needed it. My family and friends — Aunt Carol, Peter, Dallas, Michael, Alyssa, Joe, Lucy, Ethan, Ben, and special mentions to Jim, Robyn, Becky, and Emily for walking literally miles with me, being my course support, catering to my needs, whims, and demands — all played a HUGE role in my accomplishment. I literally would not have finished that marathon without the help of each of those people I just mentioned. And here’s the epiphany: THEIR HELP DOES NOT DIMINISH MY SUCCESS OR MY ACCOMPLISHMENT ONE BIT! I still get to tell the world I ran a marathon. I still get to sport that dorky 26.2 magnet on the back of my car. There is no asterisk next to the word “finisher”. Instead of being so obtuse as to think that marathon was all about me, I am fully aware of all the hands that carried my, all the shoulders I leaned on, all the arms wrapped around me from the moment I started thinking about running a marathon to the moment I crossed that finish line.

I challenge everyone to think about the accomplishments and successes you’ve had in your life. And then think long and hard about how you did that. Can you say with a clear conscience that it was ALL YOU? I’m betting not. Instead of getting defensive, try a little gratitude. Honor the role the people in your life — both known and strangers — play in getting you to the literal or figurative finish lines in your life.

Gratitude is a funny thing. Once you experience it, you become acutely aware of it in so many other places in your life and it makes you see the world differently, in a warmer light. Gratitude begets kindness — kindness to others and to yourself. Start looking for opportunities to feel gratitude — you’ll be amazed at what it does!

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#IWSG — Creative Outlets

This post is written as part of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group, where writers can share their thoughts and offer support to each other in a judgement-free zone! This month, the following question was posed: besides writing, what other creative outlets do you have?

And this question caused me immediate angst! Because I DON’T have any other creative outlets! Is that bad???? I actually don’t think of myself as a creative person, so I shouldn’t be surprised that I don;t have a lot of creative outlets. It’s funny, because I never even thought of writing as a creative outlet for myself. It has always been more of an emotional outlet. I tend to write when I’ve got feelings I need to deal with, and usually they are negative feelings or feelings that I am grappling with having. Writing offers me catharsis. Writing offers me clarity. Writing takes weight off my shoulders and mind. I never really feel like I have these thoughts or ideas that I need to share with the world (if that’s what a creative outlet is), so maybe I am just strange!

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Train Hard, Eat Clean Challenge

The boxing gym I attend, K-Fit, offered a 20 day challenge titled “Train Hard, Eat Clean”. The idea behind it was to continue with the good habit of exercise (since we were already attending classes at the gym there) and try to form the new habit of eating clean. We were challenged to focus on eating whole foods instead of processed foods and avoid sugar, including added sugars, artificial sweeteners, and alcohol. We were encouraged to eat as many fruits and vegetable as we wanted. We got a daily email with health and nutrition information as well as recipes and encouragement. I decided to take on this challenge because sugar is for sure my bugaboo. I believe sugar is addictive for some people, and I am one of them. In the past, I have found that if I eat one sugary thing, it triggers an outright binge. I also have found that I always crave sugar after a meal. Always. So I thought this challenge would be good for me to tackle.

I was right.

During this 20 day challenge, I continued to exercise as I had been. I had no alcohol and no soda. I drank water and seltzer water instead. I increased my intake of fruits and vegetables. I focused on eating whole foods as opposed to processed foods as much as possible. I avoided foods with added sugars and cut out having the sweet snacks I always had in the past. It wasn’t easy. When I am stressed, I find myself wanting a Diet Coke or something sweet. I watched Jim eat a really yummy chocolate cake for dessert one night when we went out for dinner with friends. I was faced with a barrage of sweets in the teachers lounge it seemed every day I went to work. I turned down Dan’s caramels at a meeting (if you’re local, you know just how hard THAT was!!). But I managed to do it. One way I was successful was by telling everyone what I was doing. By being upfront about it, people understood and it kept me honest. I was also fortunate enough to have a husband who supports me in every endeavor I take on. His encouragement and “atta girls” really helped me stay with it. I also had the support of a great group of people at the gym doing this right along with me. We all shared stories of successes and temptations along the way or talked about upcoming obstacles and offered encouragement to each other so we could get over those obstacles.

I lost 11 pounds in 20 days by doing this. And if I am being really honest, it was not anywhere near as hard as I thought it was going to be. I think the support system with the emails and the group at the gym and good friends and a terrific husband really carried me over the hard parts. I feel better. I feel stronger, both physically and mentally. The mental part is really huge for me, though. I have always talked about my weakness around sugar but I proved to myself that I don’t have to be weak. I CAN be strong. I AM strong, stronger than the sugar. This is really big for me. I am pretty proud of myself for doing this.

I wanted to grab a quick, ready to eat breakfast this morning so I grabbed a container of yogurt I had in the fridge that had been off limits for the past 20 days because it has added sugar in it. It was really sweet, almost too sweet if I’m telling the truth. The sweetness overpowered the vanilla flavor. I have to wonder if that has to do with not really having any sugar for the past 20 days. I’m nervous about having a piece of candy or a dessert, though. What I WANT to happen is what happened with this yogurt — I want it to be too sweet so that I don’t have the desire to eat much of it. What I am AFRAID will happen is that it will trigger those cravings all over again and I’ll be back to square one. I didn’t count on being afraid of sweets at the end of this. But I am.

I’ve made some healthy changes over these past 20 days, changes I want to keep in place. So I will keep plugging away at this. I enjoy being healthy most of the time and junky only occasionally (like I was the past 20 days). I don’t want to go back to the reverse of that. My body needs me to keep moving forward with healthy eating choices. My mind needs me to keep moving forward with healthy eating choices. It’s what I need to do if I want to live up to the slogan on the back of my K-Fit hoodie:

You. Better. Stronger.

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#IWSG — Questions

Today, I share with you my post for this month’s question from the Insecure Writer’s Support Group: What are your favorite and least favorite questions people ask you about your writing?

I love when people ask me ANY questions about my writing because that means someone is actually READING what I am writing! There are few greater thrills in life than seeing a notification that I got a comment on one of my blog posts! I am also in the process of writing a novel (have been for a few years now), so I also enjoy when people ask me what it’s about. Maybe someday I’ll finish it…..

I get uncomfortable when people ask me where I get my ideas for the things I write because my answer is pretty unremarkable — I get my ideas from life and the world around me. There is no magic pill available for inspiration. I just find it where and when I can! I feel like when people ask, “Where do you get your ideas from?”, they’re looking for an answer that either wows them (if they’re not writers themselves) or points them in a definite direction (if they are also writers). I never feel like I can answer this question adequately!

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2018 Year in Review

2018 is in the rear view mirror, and that’s fine. I feel fortunate that 2018 was not necessarily a highly eventful year — I didn’t have any real bad experiences, but I also didn’t have any superbly outstanding events, either. Some highlights, in no particular order:

1.) Boxing class: In January 2018, I started taking a boxing fitness class and it has literally changed my life. I love the variety of activities we do. I love the emotional release I get from donning a pair of gloves and hitting a bag. I love how strong I feel when I can do an exercise the way it’s supposed to be done instead of modified. I love the supportive atmosphere — the instructors and the other women who are in class are simply some of the best people on Earth. I can’t remember the last time I enjoyed anything as much as I enjoy my boxing classes!

I can throw a punch — do not mess with me 🙂

2.) New grade book platform: This school year, our district adopted a new online grade book platform to coordinate with our transition to standards-based grading. I’m not going to name the program because I’m not interested in bashing the company/product by name. But the transition has not been easy. It has been hard trying to learn the beck end to get the program up and running, and it has been challenging to assist teachers as they try to learn the ins and outs and figure out how to make it work for them and their parents and students. I’m not thrilled with this grade book program — I feel like it was sold to us one way but it is much different in reality. So it’s been a bit exhausting.

3.) Grand kitty: My daughter and her boyfriend got a cat named Fergus, and he is such a fun cat! I love playing with him and cuddling him — he makes me miss having a cat so much!

4.) My first grant: I applied for and was awarded with my very first grant at work! I was awarded $1000 from Window World of Joliet to purchase STEM materials for the maker spaces at our 4 school buildings. It was pretty exciting to get free money!

Receiving my check for the grant I won from Window World of Joliet. Joining me are 2 of my co-workers, Sarah and Lesley and the owner of Window World of Joliet.

5.) Mom’s big move: My mom sold her house that was a half mile down toe road from me and moved to a single story house in an active adult community 30 miles away from me. It is weird not having my mom right down the road, but I am happy for my mom having an brand new home that is easy for her to move around in!

6.) Hamilton! For Valentine’s Day, Jim took me to see Hamilton, and that started a love affair! I have seen it two more times since then and listened to the soundtrack countless times. I simply cannot get enough. I love the music, the story, the artistry — how lucky I am to be alive right now 🙂

My first time at Hamilton!

7.) Court case settled! In August 2016, Jim was hit by a car while running which caused him to injure his shoulder and required surgery and physical therapy to get fixed up. The court case for this incident was finally settled in November — a little more than 2 years after it happened! I am thrilled that this is over and done — and that it was settled without having to go in and experience my first deposition!

8.) #MeToo and #WhyIDidntReport: These 2 movements brought out of me the admission that I was the victim of sexual assault twice in my life — once when I was about 10 years old and again when I was about 14 years old. I never told the world about these things but felt compelled to do it this year to help shine a light in the fact that there is hardly a female alive who has not experienced sexual harassment or sexual assault and that there are so, so many of us who never reported it (like me — I never reported either incident). I really believe we need to change the culture we live in — we need to believe women when they report, we need to support women when they share, and we need to shame the men who hurt women rather than shame the women and engage in victim-blaming.

What does 2019 hold for me? I don’t know but I can’t wait to find out!

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